Take A Break Already!

I have really enjoyed not being on Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin, Pinterest or Blogger the past few days... so much so that I was able top catch up on correspodence, real work, chores, sleep and TV!

Of course the reality is sinking in that I missed noticing my husband shaved his beard, bills went unpaid, and my dog is particularly displeased with anything that has a monitor.  On a good note, my Words With Friend people have hung in there, so thank you for playing with me.

Now, after this four day online hiatus a few things are apparent.  Facebook connections become more real, you only lose a few Twitter followers (yet still gain some too), and people on Pinterest are too absorbed with their own To Do list to notice.

So, all in all, taking a break it is ok... your saggy eyes, pounding head and stiff neck will thank you for it!

Still mastering the trade,
Jill

Oh, and what about those women on the Internet?

Source: blogcdn.flowtown.com via Courtney on Pinterest

Since I went so gaga over dada yesterday, I knew it was only right to highlight moms.

It is without a doubt, no secret, that moms are taking over the Internet.   In some stat that was shared with me verbally by somebody (yes, its that reliable) it was said that women between the ages of 25 - 45 make up something like 40 of the... you know what... I don't even remember.  So, I found the info-graphic to detail my point.

You can read it but nonetheless, 53% of the adult female population participate in social media, at least some.  And when they are online they are talking with friends about family and having fun.

Now that, is a woman.




Moms on the Internet are about having fun, whether it be with their kids, their friends, their husbands or themselves.   Of course, the truth is, how often is a mom sharing about spending time alone?  Very rarely, and when it happens, its usually in a quick facebook post that reads "Oh he's taking the kids to store!  I am going to take a nap!  You are the best husband ever!"

Today's research : Dallas Moms.  Let's see what came up.


Dallas Moms Blog
@DallasMomsBlog

This is my first find, and really one of the most simply designed female sites out there.  Its refreshing though to get a way from the glitz and bling and the bright pink.  It really opens your mind up to take in all the useful information their contributing bloggers have to offer.  The other good thing, is that the site is not over burdened with information.  Since its beginning in April 2011 there are at most 32 posts a month which is nice because otherwise a blog wins a quick trip off my blog role.   Ladies, keep it up - good work!

Dallas Single Mom

@DallasSingleMom
https://twitter.com/#!/dallassinglemom/lists

What I like most about DallasSingleMom is her Twitter lists.  This is an awesome way to a) declare your womendom and b) help your followers out.  Its true, I am list leech.  I want to know who you want to know and why... better yet, I want to be able to select who I want to know based off of why you know them.  Is this a girl thing?  Probably, but any which way, Dallas Single Mom has learned how to manage her kid(s?), her time and her friends... lists.  Follow her tips and you will probably be able to do the same.

News about Women being on the Internet

I began listening at "... preplanned the fight and and posted details about it on Facebook, which is why more than 30 women showed up ready..." is when I stopped.

Really? Post directions to a fight and 30 women will show up? I wonder how large of a crowd we would get if we posted details about a group hug.  This is why women get a bad wrap.  Thumbs down Sacramento.

There are a lot of women on the Internet.  So many that I really couldn't spare the time to decide who would make the final two entries.  That, and its the one night my husband is home this week, so I really want to race home for nice dinner with him.

If you want to shout out to a lady in Dallas, please do!  She deserves to hear your kudos.

ps, another reason for such a weak post.... I am exhausted.  To catch you up, if you didn't know, I work for a non-profit and I am trying to plan a social media blitz of sorts.  Of course, before I say "Sure this will work" or "I think this is the best way to go" I am trying it out myself.  Its a tough online world out there and if you don't have friends going in (or can't afford to pay to have the right friends) then more power to you.  So far the biggest challenge is finding the time to break away during the work day when so many others are online doing the same, and complete my job without working into the night.  Today for instance, I'm leaving on time(ish) but at what cost to the post.   Things to note and consider for when I make the proposal to the boss.   Twitter is a beast, Facebook is iffy, blogs are tough and there is so much information to process your brain could explode out of your eyes... if we are going to do this, and do this right, we need to find an intern.

5 Great Internet Dads

I have to admit that in the span of about 9 hours I have developed a super crush on internet dads.  The top qualities:

1. You love your wives!
2. You adore your children!
3. You are smart, innovative, brutally honest about the mishaps of parenthood and positive about difficult family situations.  All things which define " good dads."
4. You do not give up.  (Just like a man!?)  But the truth is, you do not give up on your relationships, your children, your family, your situations, your community, your friends. You define loyalty and unconditional love in ways that seem inhuman... 

 ...in ways that seem like dad.  So in honor of dad, here are four wonderful examples for newbies and oldies alike to follow and enjoy.  Its not all diapers and burp rags.  There's tools, toilets, birthday parties at the hardware store, nicknames and best friends since childhood.  And I am looking for pranks, because I know they have to be involved too.

Oh, and don't let me forget the giveways!  Lawn mowers, electric shavers, and more to come I'm sure.  Nonetheless - before you leave this page for a chance to win a new toy - I'll get to it.

Noah's Dad 

http://noahsdad.com/story/
@NoahsDadDotCom

"The story that Down syndrome is ok."

I ran across this story by accident and I will not ruin it in any way.  Follow the link and feel the encouragement. Once you read the story - please, make it to "Time Freeze" and continue - I suggest the New Parent link, then scour the updated daily stuff.  Its fun, its colorful, its real.  Thanks Noah's Dad for being an awesome example of parenting children with differences!


Charlie & Andy

http://www.howtobeadad.com
@HowToBeADad


Hands down these dads have this social media thing under control.  And everything they put out there screams "DAD" and almost 95,000 twitter followers agree.  And I will really tell you what made my day : Chuckletastic. I had to stop myself from repinning .... everything.  After all, I'm not a dad, so I'll pass this on to the hubster whose sense of humor is so in line I wonder if there is a DNA connection.

A Daddy's Blog : This is Not Your Mommy's Blog

http://adaddyblog.com/
@adaddyblog

I was turned onto Michael Schmid by SheIsDallas.Com and I am so glad I did not hesitate to go to the site.  I spent a full hour reserved for staff meeting preparation digging through the site.  Sure, some posts may be questionable for some readers, but he's dad... and doesn't dad always do something to raise a few eyebrows?   Mostly, I hope - and this is a direct comment - that @adaddyblog crosses #bethechampion somewhere, somehow, soon in the Dallas family scene.

Dad And Blog

dadand.com
@dadandblog

I'm not quite certain how to reference these guys, so I hope they understand that I simply call them "these guys."  These guys are the epitome of the dad next door.  And I have to admit when I went to their site and saw that admist the tools and clogged drains there was a DIY Cat Condo (etc) post I was excited and immediately bookmarked the post... along with unclogging a drain.   Keep it up guys!  I'm sending my Mr. your way this weekend!

My Dad

It wouldn't be a dad post, if I didn't mention mine.  I could go on for hours and days and weeks about what he means to me, but I won't.  Instead just know that he was my first supporter and whenever I have a crazy idea about my next "plan" he is behind me cheering me on whole heartedly.  He calls me "Peanut", he likes my husband, and our most precious moments have been spent between just the two of us.  On a drive to Arkansas in a Camero we listened to Pink Floyd and talked about what it would take to become a female comedian (I was about 6 then, and always start new ventures thinking about what it will take).   Another time I called him in tears because I couldn't drive my new stick shift so he dropped everything, came over and walked me through the motions.  Within 1 mile he told me to turn left, get into the left hand lane and within seconds I was on the highway.  I recall him laughing as though it was a thrill. (I was 16, I did not laugh.)  And then last year, on a state park beach in Jacksonville, FL, we sat by his Jeep while the tide came in and talked about babies... he gave me his official consent as though he knew a part of me waited for his go ahead. (aged undisclosed)  Daddy, I love you.  I always will.

5 Tips from Other People

Since I do not claim to be a master of anything or an expert on more than talking, today's post comes from other people's tips, tricks and suggestions.  Topics : Family, Social Media and Champions.

1.  Mars & Venus 20th Anniversary

Today marks the 20th anniversary of the original publication of this world renowned book.   I remember being in high school and reading it to try and make sense of my boyfriend.  I still have my copy to this day, and squeezed between the pages is a picture commemorating summer's romance.  After all, I was a teenaged girl trying to understand herself, her boyfriend and the world around us; not an adult trying to save a marriage.  The end result : he was ready to marry and I was not; partially because I was equipped with a hint of knowledge about our differences.  Thank you, Dr Gray!

An excerpt:

"Falling in love is always magical. It feels eternal, as if love will last forever. We naively believe that somehow we are exempt from the problems our parents had, free from the odds that love will die, assured that it is meant to be and that we are destined to live happily ever after.

But as the magic recedes and daily life takes over, it emerges that men continue to expect women to think and react like men, and women expect men to feel and behave like women."

2. RT @DivorceBusting "When our kids are challenging, we don’t divorce them. There’s a lesson in there."

Author and therapist Michelle Weiner-Davis said it right.... there is a lesson in there.  Getting hurt in loving is not an option.  Love is a painful, often difficult experience involving yourself and another person and someone is bound it say something wrong, slam a door, storm off, stay out late, skip doing their chores, and - believe it or not - be defiant, just simply because they can.

The trick... learn to love them through the foolishness to give them an example for how to react when its your turn to kick, scream, shout and possibly even cry.

3. Fingerprint Mothers Day Card

Source: busykidshappymom.org via Courtney on Pinterest

I love Pinterest and this is why.... what a fun activity that celebrates all the wonderful things about being a family.  Of course, put a drop clothe down first.  Can't you just t imagine a five year old waiting patiently for their next turn with paint all over their hands??

4. Unpack and sort your baggage

This article found on Hitchedmag.com is a refreshing take  on how to reconnect.   Especially when they get to the "baggage" issue.  I, myself, am not a fan of the "take inventory" of your baggage philosophy.  I have taken inventory and closed it up and shoved the baggage under the bed for so long there is a permanent imprint on the carpet.  However, this idea of "unpacking" it means I can trash it if it no longer fits.

My personal example : I recent found a box of old keepsakes that I tucked away into my art closet.   When I opened it for the first time after years of emotional healing, I immediately recognized these were not good keepsakes.  Aside from a stack of notes from my grandmothers, they were odd little momentos of things that brought back a lot of hurt.  Yes, I cried for about an hour; but then, I literally taped the box shut and handed it to my husband asking "Can you please take this out to the trash so it can be hauled away tomorrow?"  

And I have not hurt since.  Unpack, sort and toss would be my two cents.

5. Teen Dating 101

A lot of the baggage I was talking about harkened to be a teenager in love.   Yes, some of those romances were appropriate and sweet and lovely to for reminiscing.  Yet others, were just not good.  I was too young to know any better, and do not recall ever being told what I deserved to expect from a relationship.  If you have teens, PLEASE, share the following two sites with them.  One is a Bill of Rights, which is just incredible at laying out the information in clear, understandable terms.  The other, an easy to comprehend list of good qualities to look for in another person with whom you are going to spend a lot of time.

Bill of Rights at talktofriends.org.
What should I look for? at loveisrespect.org.

And, again, do not take my word for it - take theirs.  I am just a Jill, still trying to master the trade.

When Late Nights and Early Mornings Collide

One of the more difficult obstacles to breaking into the social media machine (besides finding followers, getting likes, connecting regularly with others, posting that you posted here there and everywhere, staying in front of the trend, and so on) is the lack of sleep!

Granted I have only been back at this for a couple days, but in that time I can estimate I have seen at least :


1,500 pictures
750 companies
375 infographics
187 websites
93 blogs
46 spam emails
23 people I might possibly maybe know
11 new virtual contacts

Source: nonprofitorgs.wordpress.com via Courtney on Pinterest

I would be discouraged except I know social media takes time, patience and a good attitude.  Also, I ran across a great article by NonProfit Tech 2.0 which relieved a lot of fears, called "11 Qualities of an Effective Social Media Manager." An article I have read three times in 24 hours, one I will commit to memory... unless its cache is maxed out by the graphic assault of being online for 12 hours in a row.

When I read "Is not over confident of her social media skills" I knew they were talking directly to me.   Time and again I will tell you that my ego is my burden.  I know I can do a lot, and I like to expect that I can get big results. Unfortunately, unless I invent the next social fad and get it uploaded, the social media world will remind me... repeatedly... that I still need to do even more to get anything else.

The final quality was more of a tip than an indicator, "Takes steps to avoid social burn out."  I am still trying to figure out what this one means.  Last night I was up until 2:00 am and back at it at 7:00 am without having had a cup of coffee yet.  Maybe once I have had a round of joe, I'll go back and review what the article  had to say about it.  Of course, this is after I go jump on Twitter to post that I blogged about an article I found on Pinterest.

What have I gotten myself into...

... again!?

It does not take long to realize the moment you have stepped too far into a situation of which you can not get out.  There are countless idioms to describe this position in life and I for one have found myself in many of them... literally.

Source: myrevelment.com via Courtney on Pinterest

I remember at age five, my grandfather backing his boat into the lake's water, handing me a rope and saying "Hold on tight, okay?"   He goes to park nearby, I drop the rope, and he returns to find me doing the dog paddle to stay afloat while drifting off with the boat.

#1 - Gotta Love the 80's.

A decade when it will still okay to leave a child hanging out alone by the dock.  I do not fault this wonderful man.  He literally drove 10 feet away and the amount of time between my taking the rope and being rescued was about 45 seconds.  And, if it had not been for this moment and the countless after I would not have learned #2.

#2 - Sink, Swim or Learn to dog paddle... quickly.

Who has not been in this situation?  At sometime in life we will all think some combination of "I can do this!", "I can fix this!?", or "How am I going to get out of this situation with an ounce of dignity?"  In fact, I know I have thought one or another or all of these myself.

And I know me well. That five year old girl looked at the rope which just landed in the water and thought "Oh, I know how to swim.  I will just go get the rope."

Just like six months ago when I began working for a non profit and thought "I can do this"; two years ago when I left a decent job to write for no money thinking "I can do this"; four years ago when the title industry went bust and I walked out the door with a cardboard box in hand wondering "How am I going to get out of this situation with an ounce of dignity?"; seven years ago when I left a good job to work from home as a small business consultant knowing "I can do this!"; ten years ago when I graduated college with a (still unused) theater degree questioning if "I can fix this!?"; and all those years ago when a soaking wet grandfather hoisted me over the side of a boat because I thought "I can do this!"

My secret : I learned to float.

I could have learned to swim in the field of finance but there was no passion. I could have panicked and kicked and screamed and flailed in the theater industry but I would have sunk from exhaustion. And yes, I could have even learned to dog paddle using a minimal amount of energy to keep my head above water as a small business owner.

Instead, I chose to lay back, put my head upon my hands, look up at the beautiful sky and enjoy the moment while planning my next move in a calm fashion.  Whether needing to pay off some debt or feed a passion, my instincts and intuition have only led me into exciting ventures.  I have an array of stories to tell, too many new skills to list, an amazing group of contacts I call friends, and so much confidence that tripping clumsily through a new situation is the only way to keep my ego in check.

The moral of this story : I have never sunk. Neither will you.  Stay calm. Use your smarts. Trust your instincts. Follow your heart.  If this is not your first "...again?" situation, it will not be your last.  Learn to float.... you will save a lot of energy for the next time; because it will happen, again.

Still learning to master a trade, Jill

So what have I gotten myself into?   Currently I am researching how to compete with non profit social media giants.  (insert laugh here)  I am such an ant!  This week my goals are to identify if I am lost in a field, burrowing through a ant farm or under a magnifying glass.... next I hope to position myself within view of those who are in the know so I can copy what they are doing. Today's great find was geekpro.com's YouTube tutorial on how to sync Gmail into Outlook which will help keep me from having to constantly log in and out of an email system I find hard to use.  Saving time is one equivalent of floating.  Thanks James!